Problem with comprehension

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

As we all know, russians word sentences differently thank native speakers of english do in russian. It is because of this factor I have much difficulty understanding russian text, especially this exerpt from "The seasons through russian literature":

Зимяя Дорога

сквозь волнистые туманы
пробирается луна
на печальные поляны
льёт печально свет она.

По дороге зимней, скучной,
тройка борзая бежит,
колокольчик однозвучный
утомительно гремит.

Что-то слышатся родное
в долгих песнях ямщика:
то разгулье удалое,
то сердечная тоска

Ни огня, ни чёрной хаты...
Глущь и снег...Навстречу мне
только вёрсты полосаты
попадаются одне.

I translated it as this, well, as far as I could get:

Through the way fog
The moon shines through
At the sorrowful meadows
It gives faint light.

On the wintery road, boring,
Тройка(?) russian winter dog runs,
a monotonous hand-bell
rings tiresomely.

Something dear is heard in the long songs of the driver:
A bold spree,
A warm depressing...

Neither a fire, nor a black hut...
The wild and the snow...Through to me
only striped versti
hit one.

I know for a fact I didn't translate this correctly. If someone would be as kind as to translate this all for me, and show me how they got it grammatically, that'd be great. Thanks!

Comments

[oryx_and_crake]

тройка is three horses
бОрзая is not a dog (you have confused it with борзАя which is a greyhound) but an adjective, synonym to быстрая (fast, speedy). So, тройка борзая бежит means that three horses harnessed into some kind of chariot are running fast.

The rest is very fine except for the last lines

Навстречу мне
Только версты полосаты
Попадаются одне -

Towards me (i.e. in the opposite direction on the road)
Only the striped mileposts I can see.
(версты is short for верстовые столбы; верста is an obsolete measure of distance, about 1.8 km if I am not mistaken;
одне is an outdated version of одни which in this context means "only")

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

Well, thanks a lot. I didn't understand a big part of it because of the grammar and what not. However, I do ponder why they worded like this, with two words means only.

[platonicus.livejournal.com]

Not a chariot, but a sledge

[oryx_and_crake]

P.S. сердечная тоска is more like "heart's sorrow"

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

Wow. I totally missed on that.

[oryx_and_crake]

P.P.S. колокольчик in this case is not a hand-bell but one fixed on the horses' harness.

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

How would one know the difference?

[lena-talaeva.livejournal.com]

( лошадей) troika {three horses harnessedabreast}, carriage-and-three;

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

Thanks. My dictionary didn't give me horse. Why wouldn't one use ëîùàäü though?

[azulejos.livejournal.com]

Well, apparently I only found one mistake... Тройка means three horses harnessed abreast, борзая is an old-fashion word for swift. Борзый конь means 'swift steed'. Th rest seems fine, though I am rather tired and could have missed smth.

Please keep in mind that poetry is constructed differently in Russian and in English and can never be easily translated.

[khathi.livejournal.com]

It depends, actually. Yesterday I've tried to translate one poem my friend written into English, and I was quite surpised how quick and easy it went. ^_^ It took me only about one hour to translate a five-stanza bit. And it seems that people liked it -- however they are not native speakers.

[azulejos.livejournal.com]

Hey, it was certainly not the only mistake :)
But it's fine...

Do you know the author's name, btw?

[spiderhood.livejournal.com]

It's Pushkin (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aleksandr_Pushkin).

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

Yeah...I can get it. I was given the name only in russian, so here it goes: À. Ïóøêèíà.

[spiderhood.livejournal.com]

> Зимяя Дорога
Btw, it's "зимняя дорога", a winter road.

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

My bad.

[gland.livejournal.com]

In translations of Russian literature, words like "troika", "versts", and "borzois" are never converted to American equivalents. It would be like translating borshch as "Campbell's Soup". See also samovar, roubles, drozhky.

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

How would I translate them then?

[oryx_and_crake]

1. "тройка борзая" has little to do with "borzoi" dictionary entry that you quote.

2. As to "never converted", I believe there is no unbending rule - it is up to the translator to decide whether it is better to use a borrowed word or to translate. Sometimes translation is indeed impossible (as with samovar or roubles) but I don't think it will be a crime for the translator to use "three horses abreast" for тройка. It all depends on the word in question and the context.

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

I see.

[chirashi-don.livejournal.com]

тройка is the title of my учебник. it's three horses -i think from a myth.

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

Wicked.

[azulejos.livejournal.com]

the best online dictionary for russian-english translations is http://lingvo.yandex.ru (there you can find troikas and whatever).

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

That's what I used.

Hope this helps. Feel free to ask more questions.

[russiandude.livejournal.com]

Here is my modification of your translation with line by line commentary, where I thought it was necessary/helpful

Winter Road

Through the waves of fog (1)
The moon is travelling (2)
Onto the doleful meadows (3)
Her sad light flows. (4)

On the wintery, boring road (5)
A speedy troika runs,
The monotononous bell
Tiresomely rings.

One can hear something dear
In the driver's lengthy songs: (6)
Now a lively celebration, (7)
Now a heartaching sorrow. (8)

Not a fire or black hut... (9)
Snow and wilderness ... Towards me (10)
Only striped roadposts (11)
One by one appear. (12)

(1) I think that "waves of" convey the imagery better than "wavy" or "wavelike"
(2) The original word means to travel, possibly with some difficulty. While I could not convey the latter bit of the meaning, I compromised with indicating that the moon is in motion.
(3) I thought doleful sounded better out loud than sorrowful, and scanned better. Mournful is also a possibility.
(4) Again, the idea of flowing and thus motion ties back to the "wave" imagery of the fog.

(5) I though my construction conveys the meaning and is easier to say. Also, boring is very clearly modifying the road and not what follows.

(6) I wanted to break it back into two lines and I think lengthy is better than long if one is talking about songs.
(7) That construction is very hard to translate and I tried to approximate it's impact on the poem with "Now a ..." I also though lively might be a better word to use than bold, simply for how it sounds out loud.
(8) Longing is also possible instead of sorrow.

(9) While neither/nor might be a more grammatically correct translation, I think it sounds awkward.
(10) Yet again, reversed the two nouns to make them flow better out loud.
(11) Versti is, of course, equally valid over roadposts.
(12) The point is that the roadposts appear one by one, or alone.

Re: Hope this helps. Feel free to ask more questions.

[oryx_and_crake]

Actually I think that "ни огня" in this context does not mean a fire but a light (though at Pushkin's time there was no real difference as all kinds of light were made with fire)

[oblomov-jerusal.livejournal.com]

You might also note that тройка, its колокольчик, ямщик and his songs are very common images in XIX century Russian poetry.

[kragoth.livejournal.com]

Sounds interesting.