(no subject)

[darth-phoenix.livejournal.com]

I was translating a Terry Pratchett phrase for use as my screen-name in MSN Messenger, and I was told that it was wrong, but I don't really want to ask this person what I did wrong (in the past, a not very helpful person...).

The Truth Shall Make Ye Fret.

I didn't know fret, so I used worry instead.

Правда вас сделает потревожиться.

At least, I think it's worry. Any help would be lovely.

Comments

[sventhelost.livejournal.com]

Правда сделает вами беспокойство

Worry instead of fret, but I think it's the same idea.

Trouble is, the difference between беспокойство and свободно is more significant than between fret and free. Not sure if it'll really come across with the same amount of humor.

[wolk-off.livejournal.com]

>Правда сделает вами беспокойство

wrong. You cannot say "сделать беспокойство" in Russian, and even if you could, "to do something to somebody" would be "сделать что-то КОМУ-ТО", NOT "кем-то" (it requires dative case, not instrumental.)

Fret in Russian is not only "беспокойство", it's also "мучение", and "to fret" из both "беспокоиться, беспокоить" and "мучиться, мучить", so I would go with

Правда заставит тебя мучиться.

I would insist on тебя instead of вас in order to keep Pratchett's pseudo-Bibleical tone :)

[darth-phoenix.livejournal.com]

I was under the impression that "ye" was the accusative of "you", which was the equivalent of вы, no?

[wolk-off.livejournal.com]

well, if it's "you" as opposed to "thou" - do you trying to say that Prachett uses YE, not THEE? -- then you're definitely right, and it's
правда заставит вас мучиться.

[darth-phoenix.livejournal.com]

Yes, a direct quotation from The Truth.

"The Truth Shall Make Ye Fret".

I thought it was "thee" first, but then read it again, and realised the Truth. But I could go look it up again, I'm not 100% certain.

[holyschist.livejournal.com]

Ye and thee fill the same place grammatically and archaic English, but thee is formal and/or plural, while ye is informal and singular.

[wolk-off.livejournal.com]

Come on. Thou / thee / thine is singular all right, it's the same as German "Du / Dich, Dir / Deine," French "tu / toi / ton," or Russian "ты / тебе, тебя / твой."

[holyschist.livejournal.com]

Oops, I reversed thee and ye: ye is formal and/or plural, thee is singular. Hrm, nevermind.

[sventhelost.livejournal.com]

*beats head on desk* I'm way too out of practice. Back to the exercise books.

[darth-phoenix.livejournal.com]

So it's basically instrumental case if it's an indirect object?

And shouldn't it be a verb "to worry" instead of a verbal adverb (I think that's what they're called).

Wouldn't yours be "The truth shall make you worried" as opposed to "The truth shall make you worry"?

[wolk-off.livejournal.com]

>Wouldn't yours be "The truth shall make you worried" as opposed to "The truth shall make you worry"?

Technically, yes. But darth_phoenix asked not about a word-by-word translation, but about a readable translation in good Russian. Unfortunately, English and Russian almost never nicely translate into each other "word by word", sometimes you have to change the entire phrase in order to make it sound approporiate.

>it's basically instrumental case if it's an indirect object

Not sure I understand the question... well, I understand its meaning but can't make a real language context out of it, sorry, just my dumb Russian head... can you give me a couple of examples so that I can say if it's OK or not?

[halina.livejournal.com]

There is a russian proverb like this: Меньше знаешь - лучше спишь. :)

The right variant of yours - Правда вас встревожит, but it's not like-Pratchett (i love him :). Or Правда будет мучительной - its like-Pratchett. :)

[valeria-kapriz.livejournal.com]

Fret - раздражение.
The Truth Shall Make Ye Fret - Правда может вас раздражать. In these case "make" doesn't translate. Russian say " горькая правда лучше, чем сладкая ложь", the same story.

[ex-ex-zhuzh.livejournal.com]

For Pete's sake, why? No pun, no fun. But if you insist, правда раздражает.

[darth-phoenix.livejournal.com]

I know, but I get bored with some English in my sn, so I translate random things into different languages!

[quem98.livejournal.com]

Except, it loses the bit that makes it funny, which is the pun off of the saying "the truth shall make ye free. The trick is to preserve that pun... if at all possible.

[darth-phoenix.livejournal.com]

I wonder what the Russian translation of the book says...

[nemica.livejournal.com]

I'd say правда лишит тебя покоя.

[oleg-gladkov.livejournal.com]

Правда глаза колет - this is a well known Russian proverb and it's the most appropriate in this case. Everyone of Russian speaking people knows it.

P.S. - Russian is my native language.

[nemica.livejournal.com]

It's not the same! Правда глаза колет means that you are guilty and trying to conceal the truth but it's impossible to do because the truth is obvious for everybody.