У кого-то есть совет мне? - Does anyone have any advice for me?

[red-kitti.livejournal.com]

Вчера я узнала что я буду жить с русской семьей на два месяца в этой осенью. У кого-то есть совет мне??? Я xочу быть xороший гость и ничего не досадного делать... (Я не когда не жила в России; я бывала там раньше но только туристом.)

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Yesterday I found out that I will live with a Russian family for two months this fall. Does anyone have any advice for me? I want to be a good guest and not do anything annoying. (I have never lived in Russia; I've only been there before as a tourist.)

I'm particularly interested in polite things to say... (Also, should I use Вы with younger members of the family?)

Comments

[ex-leave-a-c756.livejournal.com]

домой пьяная после полуночи не возвращайся

[oryx_and_crake]

I have to remind that the working language of this community is English. Many people here just started learning Russian and they will be unable to benefit from your comment unless you provide an English translation. Thanks in advance.

[vaguevogue.livejournal.com]

Я думаю, русскую семью ничем таким пронять невозможно...если это обычные люди. Просто будь вежлива и приветлива и убирай/мой за собой посуду:)

[danvolodar.livejournal.com]

Мыть за собой посуду - дурная примета.
Washing the dishes after yourself is a bad sign.

[oryx_and_crake]

I have to remind that the working language of this community is English. Many people here just started learning Russian and they will be unable to benefit from your comment unless you provide an English translation. Thanks in advance.

[red-kitti.livejournal.com]

Спасибо:)

[wolk-off.livejournal.com]

The working language of this community is English. Please write in English, or provide a translation -- many people here are still in the beginning of their study, so they simply cannot understand you.

[upor.livejournal.com]

У нас постоянно были гости. Приходило по 3-4 человека за вечер. Один раз зашел в гости Том. Его привел Слава. Я Тома видел первый раз. Мы с женой очень удивились, когда Том принялся мыть за собой тарелку. Кстати, Том русский, просто имя у него английское.
We always were surrounded by guests. 3-4 people come in usually per evening. One day Tom came in. He was invited by Slava. I saw Tom for a first time. My wife and I have wondered when Tom had started wish his dish. By the way Tom is Russian just he has English-like name.

Curious...

[happy-accidents.livejournal.com]

Was this supposed to be posted in practicerussian?

Re: Curious...

[red-kitti.livejournal.com]

Since I wrote in Russian, I figured that it would be ok... No one else seems to have any objections. If it is the wrong place, where would you recommend I put it?

[bricoleura.livejournal.com]

Oh, that’s great you get to live with a family!! I think you’ll find them very eager to teach you new phrases and words, and about life in Russia.
You should know, you’ll get fed A LOT. A lot! “Чуть-чуть” (a little bit) usually means nothing!;) I’d still get a heaping plateful of food, and a full glass (glass, not shotglass) of vodka. Speaking of which, you’re probably going to have your share of vodka.
Bring some slippers/flip flops with you. It’s customary to remove your shoes when you enter a home, and then put on a pair of “тапочки”. (i happen to walk around the house barefoot a lot, and this seems universally frowned upon)
Bring some photos of your family and friends, and of your city. People will be very interested. Also bring some little gifts with you. I live near an Indian reservation, so i brought some Native American handicrafts—went over very well!
Can’t think of anything else right now, but if you have any questions (or just need reassurance:) let me know:)

[red-kitti.livejournal.com]

That's exactly what I'm worried about! When I lived in Azerbaijan, I lived by myself and I was able to really control what I ate (I lost 25 pounds!!!), but I was lonely and felt very out of touch with the people at times... I decidedt to live with a family, because I really wanted to improve my Russian and get to know the culture, but I'm scared that I'm going to get fat. Я ТАК ЛЮБЛЮ РУССКУЮ КУXНЮ!

Thanks for the advice... I am just really scared that I'm going to do something to offend the family I'm living with... What kind of gifts other than Indian artifacts would you recommend?

[oryx_and_crake]

As to using Вы... The general rule is to start with Вы and ask whether it is OK to use ты, after a while. You can safely use ты when speaking to children, though.

[wolk-off.livejournal.com]

Well, I have hosted a couple of Canadian students and then a crazy American musician (who wasn't really studying Russian, but ended up speaking some Russian anyway,) and I'd say they were even quite disappointed - I had no objections against my Canadians practicing some kind of pop Buddhism (being an Orthodox Christian myself,) I was able to speak about avant-garde with my crazy sax player, and I was only too happy when my horn man practiced saxophone at my place (because my neighbors were playing French horn before that, so I felt revenged,) I wasn't pouring them huge glasses of vodka (being an abstinent at that time,) I was willing to stand any conversation on politics or religion --- which, I would guess, made me a really wrong type of Russian host :)))
Don't be afraid of anything; and, way-of-life-wise, just try to copy your hosts. I mean those little habits which mark the difference of cultures -- like changing outdoors shoes into slippers when you come home from outside, washing your hands as soon as you come home, never throwing yourself on a bed in shoes or even slippers, etc. etc. etc. People are really different (that's why I wrote all that stuff about how unusual a host I was,) so one family wouldn't give a splash when other family might feel a bit surprised or offended, etc.

Should you have any more specific questions, just ask me ;-)

[red-kitti.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I've heard that it's not good to give Russians yellow flowers, or even numbers of flowers... Is that really true?

Everything addressed....

[padruka1988.livejournal.com]

*Yellow flowers - it depends on the family

*Number of flowers - be on the safe side, and give odd numbers of flowers (my boyfriend was truly unhappy when he came here, and saw that most places sell flowers in dozens...)

*Eating/weight gain - chances are, you will be walking much more than you walk in America. Americans drive everywhere, Russians don't rely on their cars so much. To further lessen your worries about weight, suggest walks with your new friends and play games with your host siblings. Anyway, even if you gain some weight, it will be worth it. Also, a note about tea: someone mentioned that you may not even need sugar. This is true. I also don't put sugar in my tea - at home, I use Sweet & Low, but at the houses of Russian people, I just drink unsweetened tea. I really like it. Also, don't you think it might be a little... awkward... if you bring your own sugar?

*Gifts - Definitely buy things that are for display only or are self-explanatory - don't bring anything that you have to explain in-depth how it works. Story and coloring books are great for children, especially if they show American places or tell American stories. Oh, and of course, candy is always great. If it's not a big problem, try to pack different types of candy - chocolate, sour, chewy, etc. The candy in Russia tastes very different from American candy, at least in my experience. Go to a party store and buy tons of Americana items - flags, pens, buttons... Anything small and inexpensive.

*Stuff from home - I think the HUGE cities (Moscow, Yekaterinburg, etc.) publish a few newspapers in English (either for Russian news or American news... I think it's possible to buy Chicago Tribune, though it's very hard to find). So while it won't be very hard to find American things, you will get incredibly homesick sometimes (sorry, but it's true), so you will want to bring things that remind you of home. Bring as many pictures as you can. Also, bring as many CD's (or other music media of your choice) as you can. You probably shouldn't take anything electronic that can't use batteries because of the voltage difference. (in layman's terms... North American electrical outlets are different from European electrical outlets) If you absolutely must take such and such electronic, and you absolutely cannot buy it there, then it is possible to buy a voltage converter.

*Religion and politics - Read and learn as much as you possibly can about Russian history, geography, politics, everything. Know it so well that you can ask questions about it, but just accept what your family tells you. No matter how far-fetched it sounds. Something else to keep in mind - not all Russians believe that the USSR was Communist. Many may tell you that it was SOCIALIST (after all, they were the *socialist* republics). You may find yourself doing a lot of smiling and nodding. Ask lots of questions, but do not challenge the answers. As for discussing religion, they may ask questions about yours (assuming you're not of their religion, which is most likely Orthodox... and they most likely do not practice that often, but anyway) and try your hardest to describe the religion as something that is not part of you (NOT "When we proclaim that Jesus Christ died for us, and was resurrected on the third day, we become saved and then baptized. Then, we are .... everything else that follows." Instead, say, "I go to a Baptist church. Baptists generally believe that salvation comes from confessing your sins and then being baptized."). Express your interest in attending one of their religious services (I'm only familiar with Christian and Jewish services... If they happen to be Muslim, there may be different rules for outside visitors... But like I said, they are probably Orthodox - if anything...). Orthodox services are so different from Protestant services (kind of similar to Catholic services, but still pretty different). GENREALLY SPEAKING, it's ok to discuss religion... But talk about it in a completely "foreign" way - you can say what religion you are a part of, but don't discuss as though it is the unshakable truth (no matter if that's what you believe). It will just create tension.

Sorry this is very long... But I hope this answers your questions. :)))

Re: Everything addressed....

[red-kitti.livejournal.com]

Thanks for all the advice!

And you are right about the sugar - I think I'll just drink the tea plain, instead of pulling out packets of Splenda...

I hadn't thought about the candy... I guess I'll go and get some.

And thanks for the last bit about religion and politics - you bring up some very important details.

[suku-vse.livejournal.com]

If you go to an Orthodox Church, wear a skirt (the longer the better), if you knees are covered, you're OK, and don't wear pants.

As far as I remember, women are to cover their heads when in church, but I'm not sure. (At least not pants:)

Re: Everything addressed....

[wolk-off.livejournal.com]

Women are required to wear a skirt, at least knee-long, and cover their head when in church, usually with a kerchief. Any person, regardless of gender, is also required not to hold her/his hands behind the back, not to put hands into pockets, not to walk fast inside the church and, preferably, keep silence. If you need to say something to the persons you're with, whisper.

[dalyeth-ok.livejournal.com]

Women ARE to cover their heads. Besides, you usually you are not to take pictures in church and you are to speak in a low voice or in a whisper:)

[cap321.livejournal.com]

Women have to cover their heads when in church. I'm sure :-)

[suku-vse.livejournal.com]

Also, off-top, when you do shopping, try сырки, глазированные сырки, творожная масса. It's kind of cheesecake, but so delicious, and only natural components (at least for the most part.)

Антоновские яблоки ...(there is no such sort over there). Bakery stuff, bread ...(I would say that the bread and milk products of this quality could be bought here only in very expensive stores.)

So, have a nice and delicious trip.

[red-kitti.livejournal.com]

I am actually really scared that I'm going to lose control with the food over there... In the States, whenever I've wanted Russian food, I've had to go to a restaurant up in Chicago (by one of the art museums) and since I live nowhere near Chicago, that hasn't been all that often...

[ilia-yasny.livejournal.com]

I don't know whether you have water meters in America (they do in Western Europe), but in Russia you can use as much water as you like - no one counts it. I hosted once a girl from Switzerland and I couldn't persuade her not to save water, she always used the necessary minimum.

[red-kitti.livejournal.com]

That's actually a really good thing to know and something I would never have thought to ask...So, thanks! I would feel terrible about driving up my family's water bills, so it's good to know that it's not a possibility!

[upor.livejournal.com]

You can use Вы each time you are making a distance between you and another person and Ты to make distance close.
Teachers use Вы to small children when child is quilty. Like in English teachers use creds "Mr./Miz Smith"
Вы можете использовать "Вы" когда дистанцируете себя от другого человека и ты для более близкой дистанции.
Учителя используют "Вы" для детей, когда дети провинятся. В ангийском учителя используют приставки мистер или мисс к фамилии

[cyka-no-iq.livejournal.com]

you should speak with them about their habbits in housekeeping - all people are different, so it needs to be discuss.