Translation help

[upthera44.livejournal.com]

Dear Community,

Could you give me feedback on my translation below? I am mostly concerned with the difficulties of translating 'петляя по ухабам безвременья':

Much thanks!

Понадобилось двадцать лет, чтобы наше кино, петляя по ухабам безвременья, наконец-то избавилось от синдрома стыдливого страха перед «социалкой», каковая считалась меткой совкового мышления, и вслух заговорило об этом — о постсоветском социальном устройстве

“It took twenty years for our cinema, dodging along the potholes of timelessness, to finally rid itself of the syndrome of shameful avoidance of “social cinema,” which was considered a mark of Soviet thinking. Our cinema has finally spoken out about these things — about the post-Soviet social order.”

Comments

[alex-mashin.livejournal.com]

The translation is correct (except "стыдливый" is bashful not shameful, "shameful" is "постыдный"; also "заговорило" is rather "started to speak out" than "has spoken out"), although too literal, to the point of looking written by a non-native English speaker.

"Петляя по ухабам безвременья" doesn't mean much. Any translation containing "timelessness" will do.

[konstkaras.livejournal.com]

Well... your translation looks to be perfect, without any mistakes I can notice, but I'm not sure that any English speaker will understand, that "timelessness" means not "eternity" but just "a very ugly period".

[wolk-off.livejournal.com]

I would agree that too literally following that artificial style, on its slimy verge of nonsense, was not exactly a good idea -- if only your goal was not to conceal the sad fact that the original author had actually very little to say ;-)